I have felt in the wrong place at the wrong time for most of my adult life. The wrong jobs, the wrong relationships, wrong a lot of things. When I say wrong, I don’t mean like doing drugs under a bridge wrong… I mean like things I really knew weren’t for me BUT I was the good, dutiful daughter, wife, friend, etc. and there were expectations of me I needed to fulfill
I was driven by accomplishments, and I had many. Most people would think I had the life they would want, but none of those accomplishments were really fulfilling. I mean, there was even a rumor post-college that I married a really wealthy old man and was living the high life (you know Anna Nicole Smith style). Which, is kinda funny as I do have an older husband NOW but didn’t then. Also, we aren’t filthy rich. In fact, we’re pretty evenly matched- or were. I am now, effectively cutting our income in half with this leap
All of that is not to say there haven’t been many wonderful parts of my life, it’s just that the things that made me feel MOST alive, were the things I was doing the least of. Not out of lack of want to do them, but because they were not really a “stable” or typical path
But as you get older, and you see more people struggle, lose their jobs, get ill, or even die you realize how hilarious thenotion of “stability” really is. Someone at work told me yesterday, they were in a very stable position at corporate but HATED their job. Hated it so much in fact, they were loudly and openly discussing an offer from another company in the middle of the cubes. We are not promised anything, no matter where we are, and the sooner one wakes up and realizes THAT, the sooner they can really LIVE.
I am sick of safe, I am sick of spending my energy where it is least appreciated and effective. So now, after 14 years (HOW did I stay that long?!) in an office, I am jumping off the cliff and letting all the possibilities come my way- which is INSANE for a plan-aholic like me. You other plan freaks will feel me here.
Am I scared? Absolutely, but the truth is helping people change their life sustains me, art sustains me, writing sustains me, finding myself somewhere new sustains me, and being there for my husband and kids when they need me is LIFE
So, y’all, please read my blog and interact with my posts when you can. This is not idle chit chat, but it’s my livelihood. I am just going to be proof that anyone can do this. I thank all of you who have trusted me enough to let me help you with your health journey, purchased art from me, and interacted with me! I can’t wait to serve you better and serve even more people.
All the love,